dont tell me ; take me away..

update;

2009-12-25T22:16:00.003+08:00

its Christmas.

and im sure everyone's enjoying their day.

im not..

i just realise that my good friends

are keeping a distance these holidays.

kinda difficult to meet up with some of them

since some are working and busy with personal life.

well, its life.

i dont feel good abt my life anymore..

and currently,

He's pissed at me

such a lonely day..

finally;

2009-10-27T20:05:00.004+08:00

"We were given:

Two hands to hold.

Two legs to walk.

Two eyes to see.

Two ears to listen.

But why only one heart?

Because the other was given to someone else.

For us to find.."

she said.

guess what?

H1 math paper is in 14days

and yes, im one of those

who's in the top 16%

for this year! :D

(here's a story..)

i understand that each individual

have their own unique attitude

which some may not understand.

including me.

and yes..

there's a coward hiding

behind his/her computer

mocking at other people

by using other people's name.

whats the catch?

that imposter..

used my bestie's nickname

to emotionally hurt me.

i dont even know

who's that idiot

trying to intrude my life.

jealous much.

please, dont waste your time.

im not gonna get affected

by your words.

dont know whats inside

that empty head of yours.

get a life.

...

go fly kite.

bye.

im addicted to you, love.

deserted blog;

2009-10-17T00:32:00.002+08:00

"do you know what it feels like?"

she said.

blog has been deserted.

for EONS long.

hahaha!

the lazy sickness is in me.

anyways,

the school computer system is damn cocky.

they block blogger, facebook and even YAHOO.

sickening i must say.

and so, to summarise..

thats the main reason why i didnt update.

cause usually i update this blog in school.

on the lighter note,

i cleared my H2s.

Alhamdulillah :D

math A levels is in 3 weeks.

there's a need to work extra hard.

and to all my PU3 friends,

GOOD LUCK for ur As!! :D

baby its you;

that i want

update;

2009-09-15T22:09:00.003+08:00

"I dont want you to become a girl

i dream of. I want to dream of you.."

he said.

thank GOD!

finally blogger is working PERFECTO.

gives me much of a headache.

Promos is officially on.

had my first paper yesterday.

Business Mgt P1 was ok, i suppose?

tomorrow, Physical Geog.

and its killing me!

ok, bare with me.

ive got verbal diarrheoa!

you see, my exams are dragged for 3 weeks!

yes, in the midst of hari raya.

anyway.. i've realised something.

its about BASIRAH ALBA.

i think she's obsessed with NASI AYAM PENYET.

and so, ive got a new name for her!

BASIRAH PENYET! (haha)

sunshine has been awesome;

and i love love love sunshine(:

Her & Him;

2009-08-27T13:14:00.003+08:00

"you are irresistable"

he said.

HER;

went to school with you today

dont know if you'll admit but i can feel it

the wall ; the reluctance - insecure

no more comfort in your eyes like it used to be

was it your fault?

well maybe its more to mine

i know i have that problem

ever since i was nine

no matter, im trying to overcome that

with him by my side, i know i can do it

im sorry for the time i hurt you

im sorry for the times for being ignorant

i saw that hairband that was on you

the flashbacks soon came into view

there werent plenty but memorable to me

the laughter, comfort, love - its hiding from me..

& i know you're reading;

i know im at fault..

HIM;

remember those times when i cried for you?

the time when you broke your promise to be safe

i was worried sick

the thought of you leaving me, makes me weak

now that you are safe

i dont know where you have gone

you keep things to yourself

and i have no clue what's going on

still, i always pray that you are safe and sound

because i know that you'll always be around

and recently, you lost your beloved one

you said you needed me - i was the only one

but then again, you didnt beep me

i waited and was worried, cant you see?

i dont know if you'll read this and know its you

i just hope that you'll be happy through and through

& i miss you 'mat-rep' bestfriend

sick;

2009-08-26T14:48:00.006+08:00

"Absence makes the heart grow fonder"
he said.

Today was the first day of school
i have for this week.
skipped two days of school
cause i wasnt well.

TERRIBLE TERRIBLE HEADACHE!
(dont know if its cause of the injury)
i wanted to extend my MC
but im afraid i will lose out on my studies.

And yes,
much apologies for not updating this blog
cause i have no internet access at home.
really terrible! pfft!

the fasting month have started.
and its kinda exciting
but i dont look forward to Hari Raya
cause it'll be in the midst of exams.
turn off -.-

Currently at boyfie's.
trying hard to do some research.
haha! effort not paying off la..

and finally,
my deepest condolences to zack & family.
tabahkan semangat ye?
banyak2 lah berdo'a.
lebih2 lagi di bulan ramadhan yang mulia ni.
semoga rohnya dicucuri rahmat.
amin.

Love is unpredictable Love is uncontainable

Love is reliable Love is infallible

Love is right Love is wrong

Love is weak Love is strong

Love is good Love is pure

Love is real Love is sure

Love is jealous Love is pain

Love is lost Love is gained

Love is everything Love is all

Love is beautiful Love is fair

Love is demanding Love is it....

& i love you

the 70s era;

2009-08-04T09:38:00.007+08:00

the school's commemorating National's Day..

Singapore 44th year of independence this Friday.

whats the catch?

Be yourself Day! - Retro fashion

i have no clue

where i can get these clothings

and how ugly i may look.

haha :)

here are some pictures

for you guys to view

the retro styles..

70s Fashion

70s hairdo

i guess thats all for now.
:)

ILY boyfriend.

i miss you;

2009-07-28T09:52:00.002+08:00

"i miss you for one day,

i treat you to Pizza Hut. 3 days then how?"

he said.

Have you ever felt

how much you mean to someone

the moment that person embrace you tight

grab hold of you and never want to let go?

its the feeling as though

they have not meet you for eons

& they do not speak

but their body language shows.

that feeling was overwhelming

cause at that very moment

you know you mean so much to someone

that your eyes welled up.

and yesterday

boyfriend treat me to Pizza Hut for dinner!

it was AWEEESOOOMMEE!!

but a pity i wasnt that hungry.

hehe:D

and boyfriend is currently

sitting next to me :D

and he didnt MIA today

cause he dont want me to be lonely

I miss the touch of your hand in mine
Your love warms me like the morning sun shine
I miss your breath on my ear as we embrace
I miss the softness of your cheek when I touch your face
I miss the air we exchange when we kiss
Holding you tightly in my arms is what I miss
I close my eyes and I feel your love raining down on me
I open them and I tear when I realize you are not near

Bored;

2009-07-14T11:25:00.003+08:00

today PUSHENG & SANJEEVI

didnt attend school.

most prolly cause of PE today.

well, we're suppose to DANCE.

and im left to rot ALONE.

Pusheng is currently SNORING

on his AH MA's bed..

haha! :D

ok now lets talk about RELATIONSHIP

i dont understand why

some people love to show

that there's alot of drama in it

i mean..

ok, there are ups and downs in a relationship

but the way they put it is like..

SOAP OPERA! (exaggerated much?)

why do they want it to be so complicated?

a simple one is enjoyable, know.

no, seriously.

im thankful

that i have you..

random;

2009-07-13T22:14:00.003+08:00

let me depict something random

when i was bored

and the only other person

talking to me online was..

REZAL YAHAYA

; ms exquisite(: "NUDGE!!"

desperado "NUDGE!!"

; ms exquisite(: "Copy cat"

desperado "kiss the rat"

; ms exquisite(: "go home let Alba slap"

desperado "Pusheng say nevermind"

haha!

totally no link.

-.-

Love;

2009-07-13T21:56:00.002+08:00

" It feels like magic.. "

she said.

For all those times you stood by me,

For all the joy you brought to my life,

For all the wrong that you made right,

For all the love i found in you..

I'll be forever thankful

You're the one who held me up

Never let me fall

You're the one who saw me through it all

I lost my faith, you gave it back to me

You said no star was out of reach

You stood by me and I stood tall

I had your love I had it all

I'm grateful for each day you gave me

Maybe I don't know that much

But I know this much is true

I was blessed because I was loved by you

i know that he loves me cause he told me so

i know that he loves me cause his feelings show

i know that he loves me cause its obvious

and he's missing me if he's not kissing me..

UPDATED!

2009-07-13T11:44:00.005+08:00

" Your words are always a comfort to me.

Thank you for always making me feel appreciated"

he said.

First and foremost,

sorry for the dead blog.

its not my fault!

REALLY.

stupid blogger aint working properly.

cant upload pictures

and so i thought its a waste of time

haha! :D

so anyways..

i think Singaporeans are getting

REALLY PARANOID

about the current situation of

Influenza A or H1N1.

Do you know that teachers brainwashed

little kids about 1 week "holidays"

when they feel unwell.

and as we all are aware..

the trigger temperature is 37.6

but my niece was told to go home last week

when her temperature was only 37!

and she told me she need not attend school for a week!

she said her teacher said so.

HAHA!

cute or what.

i mean, it is a MUST and NEED

to take the neccessary PRECAUTION

but getting too paranoid is like,

what?? -.-

and zack,

you owe me a date.

pretty soon, oteys!

thank you for always

trying to put a smile across my face

i love you.

Dearest;

2009-06-29T00:50:00.002+08:00

" The regret is not getting her earlier "

he said.

you're not just a guy,

that i can call my boyfriend.

you're someone i trust,

someone i never want to be away from.

i wanna stay in your arms;

stay close, dont go.

Sigh..

2009-06-25T23:56:00.002+08:00

" i come for you. i come see you.."

she said.

this week have been a zombie week.

can you actually believe that im studying?

every single day!

no, seriously.

i may have verbal diarrheoa soon.

and it seems like i dont look forward to anything now.
everything feels monotonous.

exams starts next monday

and lost newfoundfriend birthday's the following day.

he's not talking to me

and so i guess we're not on talking terms now.

now i irritated boyfriend.

and so, everyone hates me now.

with me being sick and all.

wow..

i feel so alone now;

thats just life.

updates;

2009-06-21T21:05:00.004+08:00

"I hate it when we part.

The next minute, im missing you already"

-he said.

i had a very busy yet interesting weekend.

yesterday;

cousin from my dad's side got engaged.

& today;

cousin from my mum's side had an Open House.

PSSTTT!

i managed to "force" Pusheng

to eat Ice Kachang even when he's full

last friday..

HA-HA!

"I GOT 140,000 FOR BEJEWELED!

140,000 LEH! 140,000.. 140,000.. 140,000..

I BEAT BASIRAH ALBA!

140,000.. 140,000.. 140,000"

boyfriend called just to tell me this.

lol! super random.

so cute of him..

i love you;

you do know, right?

Random;

2009-06-17T03:31:00.003+08:00

I MISS YOU.

-yes, you.

do you know?

maybe you dont even care.

cause im erased;

out of your life.

bicara hati;

sukar untuk difahami.

p/s: study date tomorrow!

watching hockey JWC thereafter..

kerna perasaan sayang yang berputik;

harus ku tanam kembali.

apakan daya jika orang tak sudi..

Beautiful night;

2009-06-16T23:28:00.008+08:00

" your eyes.. the brown is so brown"

he said.

B O Y F R I E N D

have been very sweet.

looking into those brown eyes

i got lost initially..

whenever i got upset,

he'd surprise me.

he'll come over to my place

just to coax me.

all the way from the West;

in the middle of the night.

twice he did that

yet twice his plan backfired.

still, he was patient enough.

firstly, when came over, i wasnt at home.

last two nights, when he did that, he cant go home.

yet i cant get out of the house since its already 11pm.

then it started to seem like

Romeo & Juliet scene;

me looking out at the window

in the middle of the night just to look down at him.

he waited patiently under the void deck

with a present till 6am just to meet me.

it was silly;

yet so sweet of him..

that was the sweetest thing

that a guy have ever done for me.

THANK YOU.

and today,

went to watch the Hockey JWC

with Bas, Rezal & him.

Singapore vs USA.

personally,

i think the Singapore team need to mandi bunga

to rid off the bad luck.

the opponent always score at the very last minute!

then they lost the game.

played so well yet luck is not with them.

happened twice already.

Pfft! -.-

and the lost newfoundfriend scored today.

when he slide towards the spectator's stand

where i was sitting,

i dont know how to react..

-firstly cause he owed me a goal.

secondly cause of the words he said,

i dont know how to face him-

and yes, Pusheng.

these are the pictures i was referring to.

and laugh all you want.

BLUEKS!

i just wanna be there;

in your arms..

Err..

2009-06-13T12:44:00.005+08:00

i've lost my new found friend.

Beats me.

guess im not a good person

to befriend with..

i agree with Pusheng.

there are 2 types of people..

1 - who thinks too much

2 - who doesnt want to think at all

i guess this is a good application

to whats happening right now.

new found friend is no. 1

i suppose.

apparently he worry much

when BF think nothing of it..

and there's me;

who just go with the flow

and because of that behaviour,

i've lost a friend.

"you've lost a friend;

but you've got a boyfriend"

he said.

ILY

6th June '09

2009-06-07T00:55:00.008+08:00

. N E W F R I E N D F O U N D ! .

sabri.

today, went for hockey training

at Hockey Village with Bas, Rezal & Raymond.

Well, supposedly with Bas only.

Apparently someone bubble me for

40mins or so and suddenly appear with 2 other people.

and they said they're not going tgt.

-little liars-

Pfft!

. H E A R T P A I N .
=p

and guess what i did?

i resort to people watch at the interchange.

to kill time, to be exact.

its kinda interesting & funny.

especially the part where Banglas trying so hard to flirt.

but they're scary people.

-seriously-

i find myself not myself lately.

thankfully, BF understand.

i think.

& i dont know if he realise that

im not being myself.

. H A T I N G I T .

anyways..

study time hasnt been constructive.

im seriously worried.

1 week is almost up.

Geog mindmap test this Monday.

i feel terribly lonely..

even when there's a crowd around me.

i dont understand;

He cant seem to see it..

You;

2009-05-29T19:31:00.004+08:00

-when im with you;

i'll make every second count..

cause i miss you.

today..

BF made me wait for him

at the void deck.

he needs to shower.

the heat from the sun is slapping my face

B R U T A L L Y .

when i saw him in that shirt

-the one i bought for him-

he looked..

G O R G E O U S .

that i forgot about the heat.

BF thought im afraid of DOGS.

but he got shocked instead.

when the dog barked.

haha! :P

"Love is the greatest feeling,

Love is like a play,

Love is what I feel for you,

Each and every day,

Love is like a smile,

Love is like a song,

Love is a great emotion,

That keeps us going strong,

I love you with my heart,

My body and my soul,

I love the way I keep loving,

Like a love I can't control,

So remember when your eyes meet mine,

I love you with all my heart,

And I have poured my entire soul into you,

Right from the very start."

My beautiful nightmare;

2009-05-28T20:59:00.002+08:00

there's always a twist to a story;

but im not gonna let you ruin my "happily ever after.."

why do you always try to jeopardize my feelings?

you LOVE playing mind games, dont you?

do you think im still gonna be there for you,

at the end of the day?

im so sorry..

im so OVER YOU.

you've had your chance..

you blew it.

burn-midnight-oil-kinda-mood.

study. study. study.

Promo 1

soon!!

Sad;

2009-05-12T11:59:00.002+08:00

i dont know if im thinking to much..

but what im sure of is;

#1 i dont know where i stand

#2 i dont know how to show how much i miss

my "old" friends

#3 i think im losing them..

Bad day;

2009-05-11T16:15:00.004+08:00

the title of today's post says it all..

#1 i think BF is annoyed + angry at me

#2 Dad will not stop picking on me

#3 im still sick

#4 im worried about mum

#5 so much things to do, so little time

#6 i have nightmares that im scared to talk about

#7 i think i'll be eyelashes-less soon

cause it just keep on falling and i dont know who miss me

#8 i want his attention :(

sometimes, i just wish & wish..

but it'll still remain as a wish;

Errr..

2009-05-05T21:35:00.002+08:00

"Have you fed me with a special pill
That makes my feelings overflow and spill
With love for you that is so deep until
A whole ocean it can easily fill"

- A D D I C T I V E-

A person who is Gentle
A Joker who can make me chuckle
A Listener who hears me grumble
A Companion who helps me overcome a hurdle
A lover who is Loyal
Thank you for making me feel so SPECIAL

jealousy builts within me;

confused

Dead blog;

2009-05-04T11:00:00.006+08:00

haha! :D

dead blog.

very dramatic, eyh?

ANYWAYS..

currently in O hub.

having 3 periods of break.

GP mates are preparing their presentation slides.

and im having a terrible headache.

and im seriously, terribly

LAZY TO UPDATE MY BLOG!

i miss you.

Drugs;

2009-04-26T13:10:00.003+08:00

you're so...

A D D I C T I V E

and i like it..

life's been pretty much hectic.

ive been petty.

have to stay strong.

to zack;

bestie, dont keep things to yourself again.

no matter how busy i may be,

im only a phonecall away.

beep me if you need me

understand?

For all the times;

2009-04-17T22:13:00.007+08:00

B O Y F R I E N D

has been such a sweetheart!

For all the times you made me smile, thank you.
For all the times you held my hand, thank you.

For all the times you smiled at me, thank you.

For all the times you listened to me when no one else would, thank you.

For all the times you encouraged me, thank you.

For all the times you hugged me, thank you.

For all the times you shared a part of yourself with me, thank you.

For all the times you asked to spend time with me, thank you.

For all the times you trusted me, thank you.

For all the times you complimented me, thank you.

For all the times you cared about my well being, thank you.

For all the times you said "I love you", thank you.

For all the times you thought of me, thank you.

For all the times you brought me joy, thank you.

For all the times you were there when I needed you, thank you.

For all the times you missed me, thank you.

For all the times you gave me comfort, thank you.

For all the times you let me irritate you, thank you.

For all the times you looked in my eyes and filled my heart with a song, thank you.

FOR ALL THIS..

Never forget that when I smile at you, I'm saying "I love you. "

Never forget that my hand is always outstretched towards you.

Never forget that I am always here to listen to you.

Never forget that I will always stand behind you.

Never forget that I plan to hug you at least twice everyday.

Never forget that I want to spend time with you.

Never forget that I completely trust you.

Never forget that I care about you.

Never forget that I do love you, whether I say it or not.

Never forget that I'm thinking of you right now.

Never forget that you bring me joy, especially when you smile.

Never forget that I am always here for you.

Never forget that I missed you too.

Never forget that I am here anytime you need comforting.

Never forget that I still got lost in your eyes.

gotta let it burn;

there it goes..

random;

2009-04-14T19:54:00.002+08:00

An unsuspected friend;

An unsuspected friend,

With a shoulder to lend.

A smile through the pain,

Gently parts the rain.

Two hands intertwined as one,

Comfort in the setting sun.

A lost soul find its match,

Forming an impenetrable latch.

An unspoken understanding,

Offering a solid landing.

A stolen glance,

A lover's dance.

A hypnotic trance,

Whispering of chance.

An unbreakable vow,

Hidden till now.

Strength to withstand,

Bound hand in hand.

Here i go. I'm at it again.

Trying to understand my feelings for you;

Nicklas;

2009-04-11T20:59:00.002+08:00

i LOVE this guy.

really (:

updates;

2009-04-06T22:21:00.003+08:00

S C A R E D . . !

i h a v e b u t t e r f l i e s

i n m y s t o m a c h . .

Hospital appointment tomorrow;

no school for me..

had a great time yesterday.

doing schoolwork like i have no life..

well, its good to have company, yes?

thanks much love! (:

you know who you are...

i have no time to think;

to think about my personal life..

poems;

2009-04-03T21:51:00.003+08:00

Why can't I stop

Stop thinking of you

I try to fill my day

With lots of things to do

But i continue to drift

Wondering where you are

Do you have any idea

That on my heart you've left a scar

You have priorities
Places you have to be

I'm just so very sad

There's no place for me

I fell in love with you

The keeper of my heart

It's just very hard for me

Since we've been apart

I think you're amazing

A very wonderful man

You pulled me in your web

I became your greatest fan

Just thinking of you

Makes my heart race

There's no one like you

Who brings a glow to my face

Did you ever stop to see

That each time we were together

I would melt within your eyes

A feeling I'll always treasure

When i stop to think

All that we've been through

I can't help but realize

I'm addicted to you.

why dont you love me the way i love you..?

no use pondering over the past..

shush;

2009-03-31T19:50:00.008+08:00

i wanna kiss you;

but if i do then i might miss you.

OOPS..!

Bean;

2009-03-28T20:10:00.005+08:00

HELL!

see what i found on youtube.com

have a good laugh

p/s: friendly match against SAJC. we lost by 1-0

im so confused with my own feelings.

jokes;

2009-03-26T17:53:00.003+08:00

the first week of school is almost up.

but im feeling really tired already.

lots of assignments to finish.

P E N D I N G . . !

JOKES for the day (:

j o k e #1

Sometimes women are overly suspicious of their husbands.
When Adam stayed out very late for a few nights, Eve became upset.
"You're running around with other women," she charged.
"You're being unreasonable,"
Adam responded. "You're the only woman on earth."
The quarrel continued until Adam fell asleep, only to be awakened by someone poking him in the chest. It was Eve.
"What do you think you're doing?" Adam demanded.
"Counting your ribs," said Eve.

j o k e #2

A husband and wife decided they needed to use "code" to indicate that they wanted to have sex without letting their children in on it. They decided on the word Typewriter.
One day the husband told his five year old daughter, "Go tell your mommy that daddy needs to type a letter".
The child told her mother what her dad said, and her mom responded, "Tell your daddy that he can't type a letter right now cause there is a red ribbon in the typewriter." The child went back to tell her father what mommy said.
A few days later the mom told the daughter, "Tell daddy that he can type that letter now."
The child told her father, returned to her mother and announced, "Daddy said never mind with the typewriter, he already wrote the letter by hand."

wishing you'd feel the same way

about me too, baby..

random;

2009-03-25T19:56:00.005+08:00

training was as usual..

but unfortunately it rained heavily.

hence training was cut short.

haa! (:

there's changes in the hockey trainings by the way.

tournament starts in 3 weeks time!

and i have butterflies in my stomach

whenever i think about it..

my hospital appointment is in 2 weeks time.

and im really scared..

A N Y W A Y . .

im gonna do something with my hair this weekend!

what shall i do with it?

cut it short or just trim..?

hmm..

i t f e e l s l i k e i ' v e f a l l e n f o r y o u ;

i t s g e t t i n g w a y t o o d e e p . . .

but it doesnt feel right..

maybe, its just a wishful thinking that youre feeling the same way too

cuties;

2009-03-24T22:19:00.002+08:00

i want to update this blog of mine.

but im super..

T I R E D !

training;

2009-03-20T22:17:00.003+08:00

hockey season ; tournament phase..

first and foremost,

im thankful that my hospital appointment does not clash

with my A Div game.

wheew!

secondly,

for the first time while i was playing the hockey game

i do not feel tired and i panicked.

lol!

thirdly,

i am back to the position where i used to play

in primary school.

centre back.

fourthly,

i am aware that coach may change my position again

as he expect his players to be versatile.

no more surprises.

lastly,

coach officially gave us a rest day tomorrow

when we were suppose to have our training.

thanks much!

and im really tired.

time to catch my beauty sleep, yes?

gosshh...

D E P R I V E D .

p/s: friendly match against

CJC today, we won 1-0.

excuse me..

are you The One for me??

boredom;

2009-03-19T20:30:00.003+08:00

im seriously..

B O R E D !

random thoughts;

2009-03-19T19:44:00.005+08:00

relationships are the most complicated thing, eyh?

it involves strong feelings which influence our actions.

it can be the most wonderful or maybe the worse thing

that ever happen in our life.

i believe each and every one of us

has a different experience of love life, yes?

i think..
well, atleast for now..

maybe i should stay away from it?

like bestie said,

S I N G L E .

not forever though..

just for the time being, yes?

i strongly believe that

it'll do me (& other party) more good than harm

hey you,

i love you. do you know?

love;

2009-03-17T00:08:00.005+08:00

Falling in love is EASY;

Staying in love is what counts.

Falling in love and love are two different feeling.

Falling in love can be either a flash of emotions

or a first step towards love.

You have to do nothing to fall in love.

Often there's either nothing you can do to stop falling in love.

P/s: oh! i love you, booyyyfrrriiieennnddd...! ;P

i still dont quite understand these creatures;

called BOYS.. (:

broken;

2009-03-15T20:55:00.004+08:00

i thought what i used to go through was such a torment.

least did i know that this is even worse.

no wonder daddy always advise me..

do not be an extremist in favouring a person

i should have known.

i should have heed his advise long time ago.

things are just getting more complicated..

this problem is dragging other trivial matters

i feel so lost..

somebody please enlighten me..

this friendship and trust that ive built for years,

smashed in just a matter of seconds...

misunderstood;

2009-03-14T14:51:00.003+08:00

i've learnt the most important lesson in my life.

no matter how close you are

based on one incident, just one, your friends will judge you.

no matter how long they know you.

no matter how well they know you.

its totally unfair.

really.

but thats human nature, really.

and yes, im losing my best friends.

funny thing is..

i dont really care how deep a person can hurt me.

but best friends?

wow..

just because of one incident

one fcuking incident, you're judging me now.

saying that im like your "those" other friends.

im taking advantage of you?

being my best friend, i expect you to know better.

you dont want me to talk to you?

being the person that i am

i will just follow suit.

"SUIT YOURSELF, MISTER."

and yes, continue to do this to all your other close friends.

i am not your first..

everyone's leaving me..

everyone of my bestfriend.. one by one..

slowly..

leaving;

2009-03-12T22:26:00.004+08:00

-if you're talking about leaving, it should be me..

& no one shall stop me.

Open your arms to change, but please don’t lose yourself

You are what makes you who you are in sickness and in health

A friendly atmosphere has made you who you are to be

Your character is in charge and will control your destiny

You’ll go someplace you’ve never gone, you’ll make your mark again,

You will reset your standards, and sure will make new friends

As soon as today is yesterday your heart will always give

I hope you won’t regret today, cause your future longs to live

If our paths don’t cross again, I won’t forget this day

Cause I’m afraid of change, I’m scared to shift my ways

My eyes will see things they’ve never seen, but I’ve always been here

The time that counts your moments gone will teach me not to fear.

You’ll look upon your life and see familiar grounds

You’ll hear the call of memories and recognize the sound

All the lives you change will make stars disappear

And as you’re settled down, you’ll realize you’ve never left here.

patience, love..

lets pretend we're alone (:

tell me why;

2009-03-11T22:15:00.003+08:00

B R O K E N .

L O S T .

C O N F U S E D .

is this for the better or for the worst?

i just dont understand.

now where do i bring this shattered heart?

random poem;

2009-03-11T19:16:00.002+08:00

When you feel alone
just look at the spaces
between your fingers
and remember..
that's where mine fit perfectly.

Have you ever found that someone...

you'd do anything to get?

hurt;

2009-03-10T01:18:00.007+08:00

When you lose a best friend, there really is no one that can really replace them, and you spend all your life wondering where things went sour - you always miss them. It can't be helped and for this there is no real remedy. Sometimes they just have to leave you with promises to stay with you to the best of their abilities. In any case, you could do one of two things: continue as you were without them or try to fix it.

The bond will always be there

the friendship always intact;

But the time for us has come and gone

and the pages of time, you can't turn back.

I will always be a friend to you

and wonder how you are;

The smiles and laughter I will remember

and our fights have become painless scars.

Sometimes on those busy days

when you've a thousand things to do;

Please let me glide slowly through your mind

and spend some time with you.

In that quiet moment

when you're surprised to find me there;

Just remember even with the distance between us

I am still someone who cares.

i t s a l l s a i d & d o n e .

you want it to end this way.

im not gonna argue..

tears;

2009-03-09T21:36:00.004+08:00

i d o n t w a n t t o

t a l k a b o u t i t . . .

L E T S P L A Y P R E T E N D

N O W .

p/s: dear heart,

i've already warned you.

my paper heart bled profusely..

lost;

2009-03-07T07:39:00.003+08:00

if you feel that there's a wall between us,

it's built by you.

been weird and it freaks me out.

things thats running through your mind

while me, lost in outer space trying to figure whats going on.

and now, i really feel that wall.

thanks.

*smile*

Time will show and time will tell

What you need to make it well
Time will show that I know

If I let you go

(if thats what you want.. )

sports fiesta;

2009-03-06T19:54:00.004+08:00

E X H A U S T E D .

heh! :D

this year, MI had the Sports Fiesta

not the Annual Sports Meet.

something fresh, yes?

i LOIKE!

signed up for 3 events.

speedwalk.

4 x 100m relay.

netball penalty shootout.

but i only participated in 2 events.

speedwalk - GOLD.

4 x 100m relay - GOLD.

*grins*

had lotsa FUN FUN FUN!!

yes? (:

next up, inter-house games.

and yes, congrats to Garnet Cheer squad!

We (Garnet) manage to retain our champion status again this year.

be it cheer nor the events.

im so proud to be part of Garnet! :D

so patriotic suddenly -_-"

and, alhamdulillah.

passed my H1 A Levels.

OH! PW results not out yet.

friendly match tomorrow.

at NTU.

frustrated;

2009-03-05T23:00:00.006+08:00

L E S S O N L E A R N T T O D A Y . .

Admiralty is a no no for me.

why?

infested with bicycles

E V E R Y W H E R E !

while walking, you can hear..

*kring! kring!*

from every corner.

can you imagine that?

if my family ever want to move there,

i violently object!

seriously (:

oh yes.

look at the picture above.

Handry was perspiring & on his back

there's an evil face shaped of his sweat.

lol.

p/s: tomorrow's YAYNESS - sports fiesta.

tomorrow's JEER - release of A levels results.

i dont understand..

whats going on?

school;

2009-03-05T14:05:00.003+08:00

B O R E D .

what do you expect?

im having a long break on every Thurs.

from 1205 to 1445.

coolness, yes?

currently in O hub now.

trying to entertain myself with the use of technology.

haa!

having Geog lecture later.

soo not looking forward to it.

results for CT.

tsk!

thats it, dayah..

R E T A I N !

love poem;

2009-03-03T20:37:00.009+08:00

Baby..

please kiss away all my fears

catch every drop of my tears

tell me when i need you, you're all ears

look me in the eyes and sweep me off the floor

say you love me and never make my heart feel sore

please.. dont walk out the door

p/s: a wise girl once said..

"forget about the people from the past,

there's a reason they didnt make it to your future"

can you hear what my heart's saying?

can you read me?

weather;

2009-03-03T17:41:00.008+08:00

the weather's unpredictable.

it may be sunny and all of a sudden, it'll just rain.

sometimes too hot

that it causes the forestfire.

sometimes too cold

that it causes people to freeze the whole day.

and its making me sick.

health's deteriorating.

thanks to sensitive lungs, yes?

pffft! ):

dont push it..

i dont know how to react.

heart broken;

2009-02-28T22:48:00.004+08:00

the first question when you saw 'Dar..

"Dayah nangis tak?"

your first word when you saw me..

"sorry.."

tell me, babe.

whose heart is not broken

to see their loved ones lying helplessly

in the hospital?

i've seen your best and worst.

but this?

it just pains me to see.

i cant help but just look at you.

so weak yet trying to put a smile across our faces.

i was upset, confused, lost.

when i set myself deep into your eyes,

it sadden me even more.

those soft eyes trying to ensure me that you're fine.

but you're still so weak.

i may not have said how much you mean to me.

but hey, words are just words..

you know how much i love and care for you, bestfriend.

it shows, isnt it.

but alhamdulillah..

you fractured your nose only

and not other parts of your body..

p/s: get well soon, sweetheart.

you're always in my prayers.

dont leave;

2009-02-27T11:17:00.004+08:00

please be around..

though i know we havent spend much time together lately.

please be around..

remember what you had promised me?

please be around..

cause i dont know what i'll do w/o you.

please be around..

cause you dont know how much i love and care for you.

please be around..

i dont wanna be alone without having you by my side.

please.. just be around.

*shattered*

please be safe, bestfriend.

dont leave me just as yet.

i promise i'll visit you tomorrow..

freedom;

2009-02-26T12:11:00.003+08:00

Y A A A A H H H . . . !

common test's officially OVER!

PERIOD.

*grins*

you manage to encode

the way i handle things..

broken hearted girl;

2009-02-25T23:11:00.005+08:00

i dont want..

a BROKEN HEART.

- i dont wanna play the broken hearted girl.

R A N D O M . . .

its too complicated..

you have a very simple mindset.

its not helping me..

dear you,

you just couldnt be bothered, do you?

dreams;

2009-02-25T21:05:00.003+08:00

-spot the name.. (:

they said..

when we keep having the same dream,

it's bound to happen.

but what if..

we have a different dream,

of the same person?

what does that means?

l o s t !

last paper tomorrow.

i dont know if im suppose to be elated.

haa!

hockey training

resumes this week.

p/s: i love you much,

ALONG, ANGA & BUSU..

-you know who you are

do you hear me?

im talking to you.. (:

zombified;

2009-02-24T23:13:00.003+08:00

exams or common test period.

zombified.

lack of beauty sleep.

walking zombies..

p/s: happy 9teen birthday,

HENDRA DERMAWAN!

(:

-back to mugging.

AGAIN.

random;

2009-02-24T11:30:00.004+08:00

something new is about to happen.

the past is still haunting.

lost.

please catch me when i fall..

p/s:i hope you'll be there

at the end of the day..

-back to mugging

persevere;

2009-02-23T22:44:00.002+08:00

exhausted!

exhausted!!

exhausted!!!

p/s: im not complaining..

annoyed;

2009-02-22T22:43:00.005+08:00

annoyed!

stressed!

pissed off!

irritated!

i cant do this..

somebody please catch my tears..

stress period;

2009-02-21T23:48:00.002+08:00

EXAMS!

surreal;

2009-02-17T19:56:00.003+08:00

words. gestures.
thoughts. memories.

i know..
the more an individual cant figure something
the more they wanna find out
the more they wanna get their curiosity quenched.
they wanna get it solved.

im sorry..
i just cant be figured.
cause i cant be read easily like a book.
i will never let that happen.

now thats because i will never show..

cause its all about love..

♥ ms exquisite

feels so right yet so wrong;

2009-02-16T22:31:00.003+08:00

confused. puzzled.

lost. uncertainty. numb.

i have no idea how do i pen this down.

things are getting complicated.

at the spur of the moment, i just wanna confess.

but yet again, i cant do it.

its not only hurting them.

but myself as well.

im trapped.

but they'll see me as the evil one.

this thing will never end..

dear you,
do you understand what im going through?

i didnt wish for this;
i have to face it still w/o you..

♥ ms exquisite

dear heart;

2009-02-14T22:14:00.002+08:00

take me away, a secret place

a sweet escape, take me away

take me away, to better days

take me away, a hiding place..

I bruise easily,

so be gentle when you handle me;

p/s: I'm learning to fall, with no safety net,

to cushion the blow

so be gentle..

♥ ms exquisite

valentine's day!;

2009-02-14T20:50:00.004+08:00

im exhausted.

was out the whole day..

out early for my hockey friendly match

at Delta sports complex against NJC.

played a 30mins game with them

& yeah, i was hit badly.

summary.. (:

1st, NJC's team was a mix of boys + girls.

2nd, that jantan keparat with the PINK stick irritates me.

3rd, that right winger hit my left leg HARD.

4th, that jantan keparat hit me on the chin. *cheesecube..

5th, i cant walk properly.. ):

6th, i got a booboo on my legs and chin ):

after lunch, i head straight to suntec convention hall.

there were alot of people who went for the NTU seminar.

saw some of my hockey seniors there.

& yes, i miss them much.

then, i went to meet my family for dinner at Eunos.

ate.. talked.. yadayadayada.. (:

been quite some time since we did that.

i mean, with elder bro around..

went to Kovan superbowl.

know what!?

we played 2 games only.

the 4 siblings compete.

first game, i went from LAST to SECOND placing.

second game, i WON lah seyh!

woots! woots! (:

girl power..!

what a great day to spend 14th Feb..

with beloved family.. (:

p/s: no more 10 rounds.

sprints gila babi! lol.

your presence still lingers around me..

♥ ms exquisite

today;

2009-02-13T20:58:00.004+08:00

Training was fun as usual.

But we had the year ones to join us today.

Farah & Sakina joined our training.

The others were out on their basics.

Today's training wasnt really tough.

Surprisingly, i dont feel tired at all.

But my left thighs are in pain..

i overstretched those muscles while sprinting.

serve me right!

lol.

and guess what?

i find myself crushing on this particular guy.

cant take my eyes off him.

so what? no big deal..

HAPPY ADV VALENTINES! (:

p/s: friendly match against NJC tmr morning
& NTU seminar at Suntec tmr.

i dont understand; you're still in my dreams..
& im still hoping; dont wanna fall to pieces..

♥ ms exquisite

exhausted;

2009-02-12T21:02:00.004+08:00

shaka lakalaka bom! shaka lakalaka bom!

shaka lakalaka bom!

hee! so random.

had my 2.4km today..

and that marks the end of our NAPFA test.

makes me wana lala~

woot! :D

its really challenging this year.

why? well, lets see..

our hockey teacher have set a target for us.

next, dear friends trust me to be their pacer..

but alhamdulillah.. :)

i manage to push them to the finishing line.

results? As and Bs.

you go, girlfriends!

im so proud that you guys made it!

especially together with me.

and like i said, never underestimate yourself.

aite?

and congrats mirah.R for scoring A

for all the stations, yes?

i only got 4 As and a B and a C.

hah!

MOVING ON..

V-day's coming real soon.

common test is just around the corner too!

needa mug hard, yes?

definitely lah!

tsk!

while walking home just now, saw these beautiful daisies

at a shop just across the street.

i cant stop looking at it..

anyone wanna get that for me? :(

pretty sia those white ones.

sheesh!

whatever lah dayah..

p/s: business management test tmr!

let it burn.. let it burn..
i dont wanna fall to pieces..

♥ ms exquisite

choked;

2009-02-10T22:27:00.007+08:00

i feel numb.

i feel angry.

i feel stupid.

i feel fooled.

i feel hurt.

but still, whats done cant be undone.

maybe its just my fault for being stubborn.

maybe its just my fault for hoping too much.

maybe its time to really let go now.

but i know my heart still yearns for you.

hell.

you will suck the life out of me.

that is SO not gonna happen!

and yes, i hate you.

PERIOD.

on the other hand..

happy 9teenth to my beloved zack!

i love you mucho much!

more outings soon, yes?

i think i should let it burn..
though i know how much i need you.

♥ ms exquisite

contagious;

2009-02-08T13:46:00.005+08:00

its so contagious
i cannot get it out of my mind
its so outrageous
you make me feel so high

all the time.

its a state of bliss; you think you're dreaming
its the happiness inside that you're feeling
its so beautiful it makes you wanna cry..

pls dont go away;
cause i need you now..

♥ ms exquisite

dedications;

2009-02-04T21:49:00.004+08:00

Dear diary..

first and foremost,
thanks much to one & all who wished
me on my 19th birthday (:
the friends who came for dinner,
Zack & Dar who treated me to swensens,
and to all other acquintances who wished.

and yes, i celebrated my birthday this year
errmmm.. 4x??
firstly, a date with TWIN.
Next, dinner with family & close friends.
Lunch with Zack & Dar at Swensens.
& dinner again with family.

was really fun!
& thanks much for the presents!
*HUGS!*

anyways..
things are a little pretty strange.
i dont know.
its getting more complicated.

i shant be bothered.
lets just go with the flow, yes?
common test are just around the corner!
sheesh!

you're finally there..
but things arent the same..

♥ ms exquisite

home sweet home;

2009-01-27T15:08:00.004+08:00

Dear diary..

im BACK!
(:

was away for a few days.
saya balik kampung lah!
been years since i last went there.
where?
Pengerang, Johor Bahru.
nama kampungnya, Batu Mas.
and no, there's no gold(emas) there ok?
(:

yes, thats the kampung.

the one that my family always slept over

whenever we go there (:

and this lil one's name is ZUHRIN.

a cousin who's only 5!

yet he knows about BGR.

lol!

believe me, he's shying away whenever he looked at me.

oh! he loves to sing!

he'll pester me for my mp3

to listen to his favourite songs and sing.

watch the video below (:

now you know what i mean?

hee! (:

he sang JATUH CINTA LAGI BY MATTA BAND.

and this lovely baby's name is NUR LIYANA.

a new family member in abg zambri's family.

and that's my aunt whom we stayed with.

she was at the pondok to cut the coconut

while bro and her grandson accompanied her.

ok im tired.

will update again later.

i think.

i have some research + reading to do.

i love you, much.

& i need you, do you know?

♥ ms exquisite

faith;

2009-01-24T21:16:00.007+08:00

Dear diary..

i always have faith

that things will get better.

cause i have never stopped praying

since the day that i lose hope.

cause i know HE will be there to show me the way.

when i thought things are going smoothly

i have to face the reality now.

i know i have never stopped praying

and finally, HE almost answered my prayers.

least did i know that HE was about to test me too.

2 shocking news in a day.

can i handle it?

the first, yes.

the second, i was shocked that i almost forgot

how to breathe.

thankfully izyan was there.

p/s: YAY! Balik kampong! (:

WEE!

Baby, where are you?
can you hear me calling out to you?

♥ ms exquisite

that boy;

2009-01-23T23:00:00.009+08:00

Dear diary...

do you know this guy?

he's JEAN-BAPTISTE MAUNIER.

and yes, he's french.

ultrahot i must say..

oh yeah, he's 19 this year.

hee! (:

he's the actor who acted in the movie

LES CHORISTES.

its a really good movie.

you should watch.

he not only have that angelic face.

a superb voice too.

i wish i can sing and reach that high notes.

just like him (:

go watch HIM(click) sing!

p/s: i dont quite understand how this thing works.

its called FEELINGS..

all that i wish for my birthday this year is

you, baby..

♥ ms exquisite

birthday girl;

2009-01-22T23:48:00.004+08:00

Dear diary..

first and foremost,

i wanna wish AMIRAH R. happy 19th!

hope you've enjoyed the mini celebration

& the charade game today (:

hurhur!

saya sayang awak lah! (:

YADAYADAYADA..

the day end with much fun.

hang out with Apiz Y. and Handry at Yishun.

it was super fun.

thanks much korang! (:

and to mr A.H for being there, yes?

p/s: Happy Chinese New Year! (:

im still waiting..

do you know that my heart keeps mentioning your name?

♥ ms exquisite

random;

2009-01-19T22:58:00.004+08:00

Dear diary..

oh! found these..!

that day we went to marina barrage.

the experience of boarding the last train home.

lol!

baby, i cant deny this feeling..

say you love me the same way that i love you..

♥ ms exquisite

school life part 2;

2009-01-19T21:11:00.004+08:00

Dear diary..

its the start of 2nd week of school.

how did it go?

well lets see.. (:

morning run, 10 rounds around the stadium.

at the end of the day, PE 5 rounds more + agilities.

so you tell me now.. (:

haha!

its equivalent to about 6km!

though i admit its torturous, its good for me, yes?

to build up on my stamina.

especially when i did not exercise for the past 2mths!

and all i did was eating CHOCOLATES! (:

i swear im damn tired.

but im doing this for a good cause, yes?

ok, so im not complaining here..

hee! (:

furthermore, i bet this is not all.

its only a start..

im so sure there's more to come, yes?

and all i gotta to do is PERSEVERE.

and UNCLE SAM, get well soon ok?

once you're ok, you can teman me study, yes?

yayness!! :D

sayang awak! (:

p/s: suddenly, this feeling creeps within me.

and as always, i will still remain ignorant of that feeling.

i will face it when the person is brave enough to admit..

you are my love; you cant see that

but i love you.. as always..

♥ ms exquisite

school life;

2009-01-16T23:02:00.006+08:00

Dear diary..

first week of school is up.
but it feels like its been weeks.
wow..
i swear its really tiring.
yes? ):

oh, guess what!? guess what!?
FITNESS has started.
DAMN!
had my 2.4km run yesterday.
hockey training, we had fitness as a start today.

and yes, my whole body is aching.
im super tired.
there's loads of assignments screaming for my attention.
haha! (:

p/s: 1o rounds around the school track

every monday morning.. (:

im still waiting for that day to arrive..

♥ ms exquisite

unwell;

2009-01-14T22:06:00.005+08:00

Dear diary..

there's lots to do when it's only 2nd day of school.

i had to do a GP essay which accounts 50% of CT.

and i was really lost.

thankfully there's a forum on the topic i chose.

and yes, KUIH helped me alot.

but my sacrifice to turn in late was backfired.

i fell sick.

really really sick.

i didnt attend school today.

& my whole body's weak and my throat hurts alot, yes?

but i went to school for a moment to hand in my GP essay.

had to miss my hockey training.

it breaks my heart, really.

went down to the pitch before i leave school

to salam my coachie.

coachie asked about my presence for training.

i feel pressured when he said,

"you have to come for every training because YOU are one of the main players"

whoa.. im really scared.

can i cope..?

p/s: X is blogging the exact same way that i did.

Y is using the same lingo as me, yes?

i love you, yes i do..
& aku sedang menanti yang tidak pasti.

♥ ms exquisite

release of O level results;

2009-01-12T22:41:00.005+08:00

Dear diary..

today's the first day of school.

and i hate the first day of school.

feel so lethargic!

and yes, i dread going to school.

heh. (:

mr casanova bf took his O level results today.

he did ok, i suppose?

but i cant deny that im abit disappointed.

however, im sure he did tried his best.

and i hope that he'll get the course that he wanted.

anyways, HE text me hours ago.

i was shocked as i read his text.

i do feel sorry for his loss.

but i dont get the meaning of him telling me about it.

as much as i want to reply his text, i refrain myself.

maybe its not the right thing to do.

p/s: i just dont know anymore..

i still do love you. just too much..

but maybe, its just right to remain ignorant

of my own feelings..

♥ ms exquisite

online movies;

2009-01-09T22:57:00.005+08:00

Dear diary..

guess what? uncle sam just send a few picts.
our trip to Afamosa, Melaka.
didnt get all of 'em though.
cause apparently abg Asri is compiling 'em.
so ima show a few here, aites?

ok.. Abg Asri snapped this picture.
so, he's not in it. Duh~
oh! His birthday also falls on 1st feb.
awesomeness..! (:
anyway, this pict was taken dekat depan bangalow yang kita menginap (:

ok, this picture was gerek. lol!
cousins at their crazy period?
i dont know.
this picture was taken at the big field of Dataran Pahlawan Mall.

and this was taken on the first day we hit the pool.
at the back of the bangalow.
coolness, yes? (:
but the place has its flaws too and its TOTALLY profiteering there.
really.

YADAYADAYADA;

today i spent my day watching movies online.

thanks to kuih lah.

apparently he was watching movie online first.

and he tempt me.

so.. WALA!

movie #1

ok, this movie is funny.

but a lil disgusting though.

warning!

dont eat while watching this movie ok.

seriously. heed my advise.

but overall, not bad..

movie #2

ok.. i didnt get to watch this movie when its out.

i just watched it.

dont laugh at me ok.

laugh WITH me.

AHAHAHAHAHAH.

ok lame. :D

the movie's great.

movie #3

this movie is OLD.

believe me.

and i just got the chance to watch it.

NOW.

ok, toodles noodles!

*off to watch this clip*

i dont wanna play the broken-hearted girl.
i love you. i do..

♥ ms exquisite

note-to-self;

2009-01-09T14:49:00.004+08:00

Dear diary..

im suppose to be out with Aini & Amirah R today.

out for bag hunting for school.

mum was reluctant to let me go last night.

but it happens that she's down with high fever today.

hence, im stuck at home yet again.

i didnt have the heart to leave her alone.

anyways, past few nights have been AWESOOMMEE!

thanks to those 4 fabulous people.

oh! we have nicknames for each other now.

hehe!

namely, paedophile, kuih, pisang aka uncle jj & uncle sam.

yes, they're all guys! except me.

lol!

and we even came up with stupid games due to boredom.

still, its fun and AWESOME..!

lol!

on the sad note, uncle sam was right.

when i am P, i dont show.

wow, seems like you know me well eyh?

sayang awak lah!

school's starting pretty soon.

& yes, im not ready.

i dont have my running shoes.

neither a bagpack!

oh shucks!

p/s: nobody ever said life is easy.

there's ups and downs.

its not a matter of what you went through

neither what you are feeling.

its a matter of how you handle it.

how you turn it around to make it something positive..

it has never been easy but i do love you, till now.

in silence..

♥ ms exquisite

just another beautiful story;

2009-01-08T21:53:00.004+08:00

Dear diary..

nobody said it would be easy.

no matter what people say, in the end,

its their call.

and yes, being a third party is hard too.

knowing both sides of the story.

understand but dont know what to do.

of course, as a friend, i want the best for my friends.

but still, as i said..

its their call..

Once upon a time there was an island where all the feelings lived; happiness, sadness, knowledge, and all the others, including love.

One day it was announced to all of the feelings that the island was going to sink to the bottom of the ocean. So all the feelings prepared their boats to leave. Love was the only one that stayed. She wanted to preserve the island paradise until the last possible moment. When the island was almost totally under, Love decided it was time to leave. She began looking for someone to ask for help.

Just then Richness was passing by in a grand boat. Love asked, "Richness, Can I come with you on your boat?" Richness answered, " I'm sorry, but there is a lot of silver and gold on my boat and there would be no room for you anywhere." Then Love decided to ask Vanity for help who was passing in a beautiful vessel. Love cried out, "Vanity, help me please."

"I can't help you", Vanity said, "You are all wet and will damage my beautiful boat." Next, Love saw Sadness passing by. Love said, "Sadness, please let me go with you." Sadness answered, "Love, I'm sorry, but, I just need to be alone now." Then, Love saw Happiness.

Love cried out, " Happiness, please take me with you." But Happiness was so overjoyed that he didn't hear Love calling to him. Love began to cry.

Then, she heard a voice say, "Come Love, I will take you with me." It was an elder. Love felt so blessed and overjoyed that she forgot to ask the elder his name. When they arrived on land the elder went on his way. Love realized how much she owed the elder.

Love then found Knowledge and asked, "Who was it that helped me?" "It was Time", Knowledge answered. "But why did Time help me when no one else would?", Love asked.

Knowledge smiled and with deep wisdom and sincerity, answered,
"Because only Time is capable of understanding how great Love is."

p/s: cinta itu tidak semestinya memiliki..

because my love for you is real.

♥ ms exquisite

my loss & my gain;

2009-01-07T18:27:00.003+08:00

Dear diary..

i had to miss the sentosa outing with my hockey babes.
firstly, mum wants me home.
secondly, im still sick.
cough + running nose is not going away..
well, its really sad.
but im looking at the positive side though.

though i spend my time rotting at home,
uncle sam's company really fills my day.
oh! did i mention he loves to gimme advise?
hurhur!
what a nice chap!
but he's only 20 lahh..
not really an uncle.

and guess what?
he's really good at getting info about me.
birthdays and all, without me informing him.
dangerous eyh?
cunning, maybe?
haa! no matter, sayang awak lah cousin! (:

p/s: thanks for trying to get the movie that i want to watch, uncle sam!
and thanks for the songs mr Aliff! (:

on the sad note, goodbye mr eyecandy..
i cant send you off tonight..
but im gonna miss you much.
come back real soon, yes?
*HUGS!*

i'll do whatever it takes to have you, baby..

♥ ms exquisite

the one that i want;

2009-01-05T23:37:00.004+08:00

Dear diary..

guess what! guess what! guess what!!

i've got that watch that i wanted!

woohoo!

that Baby G watch.

but i got myself the yellow one.

not the black/pink that i wanted.

because the yellow one look nicer on me.

really!

the one that i wanted looks funny.

lol!

im super happy, can?

hurhur!

now all that i need is that samsung pixon.

like really badly..

i love you.

baby come back..

♥ ms exquisite

those silly people;

2009-01-03T19:46:00.004+08:00

Dear diary..

i dont know if it's just me or them.

i dont look like an ang moh do i, people?

please enlighten me..

for the umpteen time im saying this.

i am a MALAY. a pure malay, that is.

why do people think im a eurasian?

sccuuuuuse me?

most irritating part comes along when actually,

they can see that im with my parents!

mum, who's wearing a tudung.

dad, who obviously looked like a malay.

what the hell people?

so tell me.

is it really me or is it you?

once, a girl came up to me and said,

"oh? you're a malay??"

and i was like..

"yeahh.. why?" feeling embarrased.

and she asnwered..

"nahh, you dont look like a malay.

surprised when you actually speak malay"

and that was during a competition.

we became friends since but they labelled me

as that "eurasian girl".

wow. should i be proud?

and just now, went to eat at tampines with parents.

ordered some food and the person was mesmerized.

she looked at me and said,

"wahh.. blue eyes arh. very nice lehh"

i felt so paiseh and i think she's dumb in a way.

"its contact lense.." i answered her sheepishly.

the best part was mum was just beside me.

oh my gosh! so obvious isnt it?

and i just wanna know is she really dumb?

or she just want to bodek2 me because i ordered

food from her stall.

i dare not go back.

she was so mesmerized by either my eyes or me.

told mum to collect the food then.

wow..

so to my dearie friends reading this post,

TELL ME.

what was your first impression when 'yall first saw me?

i DO look like a malay.

right?

please englighten me

cause i dont know if i should be proud or sad.

haha!

i aint angry about those comments.

just confused of my physical features.

and the way i look.

its best if i remain ignorant of the way i feel for you, boy.

♥ ms exquisite

new year;

2009-01-01T15:00:00.004+08:00

Dear diary..

i cant believe that it's already 2009.

wow..

time flies, ey?

a month more and im turning 19.

sighh..

anyway, happy new year!

and to my beloved Khairi, happy 18th!

i despise you for the whole world's countdown

to your birthday.

every year without fail.

grrr..!

and the best part of each new year's eve is,

spending time with beloved people.

and alot of funny things that happened.

for 2years now. without fail.

my nephew.. (:

p/s: im looking forward for 2009 now (:

Dec 2007

Dec 2008

i cant help falling in love..
pls stop me..

♥ ms exquisite

re-enactment;

2008-12-30T23:33:00.012+08:00

Dear diary..

been busy. really.
i dont even know what i did.
and guess what? 2008 is ending soon.
anyways, sorry i didnt update, yes?

so here are my posts (:

30th December

i went to east coast with izyan.
we're suppose to have a date.
but the plan's changed a little cause of something.
no matter, i still had fun (:
but sadly, i didnt take much photos..

oh, that was just a passing cloud (:

happy yan who finally gets her Mega Mcspicy (:

i love her much!

can bestfriend? (:

p/s: i made some new friends.

i think? (:

29th December

we had our Hockey Carnival.

but sadly, we didnt really make it to the finals.

however, we had much fun, yes?

and i really miss hockey trainings.

haha!

cant believed i actually said that!

Match: Crescent Girls Vs MI A.

oh! im in MI B. hee! (:

look at the players patronizing their stalls.

which is directly infront of us.

we've got free smell ONLY.

pic was taken with sis. after the first match that we had.
MI B Vs CJC.

we won the first match though.

pic was taken while having a bus ride to Far East Plaza.

the usual place that we went to have our lunch.
when we have our trainings at Delta (:

i was looking at THEM.

bwahaha.. (:

The pic that fufu and nana actually agreed.

that it looked nice?

lol!

Take #2.

which fufu said she looked chubby??

Take #1.

which nana said she looked fat.

lol!

anyways, we head to LIDO after lunch.

to chillax.

i really had fun.

take a look at this video.

you may not get whatever thats happening.

but its ok. (:

i trust you enough to come back to me..

♥ ms exquisite

home;

2008-12-28T20:41:00.005+08:00

Dear diary..

back!

missed me much?

hurhur!

im exausted.

update when im free!

i need my rest.

i have my hockey carnival tomorrow.

need as much energy.

p/s: i had so much fun! (:

till next time, yes?

love you mucho much! (:

menanti yang tak pasti

aku masih menanti kerna kau yang ku sayangi..

♥ ms exquisite

2008-12-23T20:29:00.003+08:00

Dear diary..

I need to know if you’re my true friend,

will you be by my side until the end?

Can I tell you my secrets deep,

and trust them in your heart you’ll keep?

We are neither of us without our flaws,

can you accept mine as I will yours?

I’ll be a shoulder to cry on when you’re blue,

will you be there for me when I need you?

No matter how busy I will make time for you,

if you are busy will you make time for me too?

I will take your hand and comfort your tears,

will you hold me and soothe my fears?

I will give you joy and many warm smiles,

can we share that even across many miles?

I will not forget what’s important to you,

will you remember what’s important to me too?

With you my most favourite things I’ll share,

If only I know do you truly care?

If you can accept me as I do you,

then I will know you are a friend most true.

i have never experience the true meaning of it.

somehow, having my stay in my current school proves it.

it was worthwhile..

but im afraid just when im feeling comfortable,

things are gonna get worse all over again.

friendships forged because they want that limelight.

friendships forged because im with this particular guy.

friendships forged for the sake of guys who are always around me.

thing is, they dont understand me.

neither did they try..

i went astray..

to forget the misery.

they left me by myself whenever im down in the dumps.

but now, the boys are making the effort,

to get me back with them.

but me? i cant..

cant forget what they made me go through..

i have been alone.

just too long..

and im tired of running away..

im tired of searching.

all that i want is to rest.

p/s: will you wipe away those tears?

and keep me away from my fears..?

)':

i still cant let go..
cause i love you just too much..

♥ ms exquisite

2008-12-22T18:34:00.005+08:00

Dear diary..

Don't wanna close the door,

Don't wanna give up on it

Don't wanna fight no more,

We'll find a way around it,

Where's the love we had?

We can make it last

Tell me what I gotta be,
Tell me what you wanna do

'Cause I can't live my life

The way you want me to

You know I can't go on

Living like we do

Do I have to cry for you?

So tell me what it's for,

If there's no winner in it?

Nobody's keeping score,

Let's start from the beginning

Can we make it last

Where’s the love we had

Tell me what I gotta be,

Tell me what you wanna do

'Cause I can't live my life

The way you want me to

You know I can't go on

Living like we do

Do I have to cry for you?

Do I gotta stand in the cold dark night

Till the morning light

Do I have to say

I won't let you get away

What do I gotta be,

Tell me what you wanna do'

Cause I can't live my life

The way you want me to

You know I can't go on

Living like we do

Do I have to cry for you?

its useless..

its over.

i dont wanna be that stubborn girl no more.

maybe its just my wishful thinking,

that everything's gonna be fine..

everything's all over the place now.

maybe i should have stopped believing long ago..

it hurts so bad.

as though someone is extracting half of your life

away from your body..

i need to catch my breath.

i cant breathe..

p/s: i want my mr eyecandy.. ):

that stranger whom i still cant stop loving..

♥ ms exquisite

2008-12-22T16:55:00.004+08:00

Dear diary..

have any of you watched this movie..?

Angus, thongs and perfect snogging

its really good.

you guys should watch it.

the catch to this movie?

the 18-yeard-old heartthrob.

Aaron johnson who played robbie.

featuring.. Aaron Johnson!

oh i love this last pic the best!

he looks ultraHOT.

but not as gorgeous and charming as my mr eyecandy

(:

YADAYADAYADA..

p/s: dear zack, you dont trust anyone do you?

you dont want a friend. you dont need one?

but you need me? heyy.. im in your shoes.. i know how you're feeling.

im hurt too.. ):

and there's you whom i love-hurt me.
and there's you whom i trust-abuse it.
whats left of me?

♥ ms exquisite

2008-12-22T12:17:00.006+08:00

Dear diary..

yesterday, i saw mr eyecandy at a family gathering.

guess what? he's ULTRAHOT, can?

especially when he's in my fav color clothing.

the best part was when he gave me those killer smile.

and the most sexiest look.

dia menggodaku! tsk!

haha! (:

but we didnt have the chance to talk.

izzy bizzy!

but i think i'll see him again.

SOON. pretty soon.

hee! (: i hope..

atleast before he'll go back to Aussie.

idk why im waiting,

idk why i care,

idk why i cnt stop loving you..

♥ ms exquisite